There are too few words to describe how utterly awful this film is.
Perhaps abominable comes closest?
It's laughable, horrifically cast, and IMMEASURABLY cheesy.
Japan, ninja, yakuza, and all the rest are GIFTS ON A PLATTER, but from the get-go the filmmakers poo-poo that platter.
Terrible writing, Japanese with British accents, gangly actors with zero fighting skills, the prominence of a South Korean car company, and some sun-like jewel that channels emotions like a laser beam are Exhibits A thru E in an infinite array against clear thinking and sound logic.
This film could have been next-level fantastic, but nope, it's an embarrassment from head to toe.
In a duel to the death, I'd put my money on Gymkata before Snake Eyes every day of the week.
